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Monday, March 7, 2016

     Vying for the last two Elements of Harmony, Democratic candidates Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton attended another CNN hosted debate last night. Bernie scored another upset over Hillary last week, when he obtained the backing of the Element of Laughter. “People just think I’m funny,” remarked Sanders, upon hearing the news of Laughter’s support. A dismayed Clinton, down two Elements now, exclaimed to reporters, “Well, I tried my best crazy faces, in the spirit of Pinkie Pie, but it just wasn’t enough this time.” When spoke to one voter, she replied, “Those were some crazy faces…but they just came off…I dunno…kinda scary.” Sanders now has full support from the Elements of Laughter, Generosity and Honesty. Clinton, on the other hand, has only managed to win over the Element of Loyalty, mainly due to her faithfulness to her major financial donors. The heat will be on next Tuesday when we find out how the Element of Kindness vote will swing. Insider sources say Sanders is leading in the polls and most signs point to him picking up his fourth Element of the race. We spoke to the Clinton campaign office about the projection next week and one of their staffers responded, “Yeah, we’ve heard those numbers. And look, anything can happen in this race right now. Our polls show us gaining, actually. And besides, if we get the Element of Magic, as we’re predicting, it won’t matter anyway. Game over, Sanders. Burn!”

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1 Comment

  • #1
    03/08/2016 8:14 pm

    If Bernie gaines momentum and becomes a real threat, he’ll pick up the element of surprise….surprise, you’re dead.

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